God is love. He didn’t need us. But he wanted us. And that is the most amazing thing. ~ Rick Warren
My fiancé, Annie, and I have been engaged three weeks today! It’s crazy how fast time is flying by.
In the past 8 months of being together I have learned so much. We have had many conversations that have helped us both grow towards God as well as each other. One of the biggest things I have learned is how to truly love her even more than I did the day before.
Now, before you continue reading you must understand that I always seek God’s word when I am trying to learn about something whether that is how to deal with fear, worry, doubt, anxiety, how to pray, or in this case how to love.
So when I wanted to draw closer to Annie and learn how to love her more I started seeking bible verses about…. *ding ding ding* you guessed it; Love! The first verse God brought me to was 1 John 3:16 which states, “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters [as Christ did for us].”
When I read this verse my eyes opened up wide in astonishment because I realized that if I wanted to love Annie fully, then I needed to love her like Christ loves her. However, I realized that I needed to understand how much He loved ME before I could display His love for her, to her.
From this one verse God taught me that:
- He GAVE to me
- He was COMMITTED to me
- He LAID DOWN HIS LIFE for me
- He saw me as VALUABLE
- He WANTED me
I learned that I need to GIVE to Annie BECAUSE God gave to me. Too many people enter into relationships with the mindset of what they can get from the other person rather than how much they can GIVE to them. I can definitely say that never works. I can personally attest to that. It may work for a while, but eventually the relationship becomes dull because both people start to feel unvalued, unwanted or unloved. The relationship starts to feel like a game of tug-of-war; “I will do something for you IF you do something for me.”
THINK ABOUT IT: Love is about what you can GIVE to a person, not what you can GET.
Look at the life of Jesus. Jesus always did for others even when they didn’t deserve it, when they doubted Him, when they betrayed Him, and when they would never love Him back. What if Jesus had said “I will die on this cross for you ONLY IF you love me back”? Instead He said, “I want to die on this cross so that I can show you just how much I love you…. even if you never love me back.” That is how much He is willing to give in the relationship; EVERYTHING with no return.
CLOSING THOUGHTS: What would it look like if you began to ask God for the ability to love the people in your life the way Jesus has loved you?
This may just change your perspective!
Other helpful verses on this topic of love are:
- “But God shows his love for us in this: Yet while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8
- “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:34-35
- “This is my commandment: That you love one another, just as I have loved you.” John 15:12
- “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25
- “We love because He first loved us.” John 4:19
SIDE NOTE: A couple months into our relationship I started reading The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapmen book which really helped me understand Annie’s love language and how to fill her love tank up to the brim. I highly recommend it!